its a dirty job

I finally met a guy who instinctively knew how to treat me during sex. We went for it two long hot hours. I told him my email address and wanted him to contact me. So far no message. He probably forgot the address. Ive been wanking over our (s)experience for two days now. Here's hoping for the best.

Apart from that awesome experience Ive been having a bit of a break from the whole sex thing. Sydney really brings that shit outta me but now Im living in Melbourne. Here Im toning it down a bit but after friday night I was hoping I could have a regular fuck buddy who talked ultra dirty while I was licking his hot arse. eg. "Come on clean that dirty hole mate" or while he was pounding my arse. "I bet you've had plenty of blokes up here havent ya?".

The good news is I have been concentraing on other aspects of my life like helping to overthrow this appalling Howard Government. Its a dirty job but someone's gotta do it.

Power & Weakness

Dinner at a Japanese Restaurant in Surry Hills at 8pm with a female friend. Its 6pm. Two hours to waste. I bought some boring shoes for work, a crappy muffin and a book by John Ralston Saul (which I expect will be good). After doing all that, I still had one and a half hours spare. I went into a Chinatown sex club.

I stuck my cock through a glory hole as I watched on the monitor a blonde girl receive double penetration in her vagina and asshole. The two beefy guys with monster white cocks pounded her with such ferocity that all she could do was scream oh yeah while trying to hide the pain that clouded over her face intermittently. One of the men asked Do you want more? She screamed YES! I got hard. A mouth started to suck my cock slowly through the glory hole. He was good. I let him enjoy himself for while then started to take my cock away from him and feigned pulling my jocks up over my hard dick as if to leave. He grabbed it back and deep throated it. He nearly made me cum but I pulled out and this time really did abandon the blow job. Pleadingly he whispered Please. I opened the door behind me and went into the main cruise area.

There, in the dark main arena of the club, he kept walking past me and motioning with his head to follow him into one of the cubicles. He looked late 20s early 30s. I ignored him a few times then after looking at my watch I decided to step into one of them and let him follow. I locked the door, got out my cock and he fell to his knees. He sucked and sucked. I stared down at him like a god with the meat he needed to satisfy his spiritual and earthly needs. I sat down. His mouth stayed on my cock. He made noises like a baby feeding. I whispered You keep sucking til I say stop. Still sucking he nodded yes. Then looking up for a breather he said I'll do whatever you want. I will suck as long as you want. You are my master. He had an accent that may have been German but possibly Polish or some other Eastern Bloc country. I held my cock from him and made him prove how much he wanted my dick. I told him for fight to get to it. His mouth went crazy and he begged me. I still didnt let him get to it. He begged more, rubbed his face in my balls. Please! I let him at it and he sucked deep and hard. He thanked me. Sweat covered his forehead. I sat back and told him make me cum. His head bobbed up and down up and down. Dont you fuckin stop til I cum. I took it away from him again briefly and warned You stop before I cum, I fuck off ok? He looked up in shock I will suck you.

I continued to sit back and let him do his job. He was committed now and wasnt going to stop til he got his reward ie. my load. Good boy. You're a good cucksucker. I whispered every now and then. Keep going cocksucker. That feeling of absolute dominance over someone can be intoxicating. The fantasy of total power over another man can be a real turn on. I wondered if he would ever agree to coming over to my place sometime and spend the whole night with my cock in his mouth because I demand it? I watched him some more. His baby noises got more expressive. I got more demanding as I checked the time again. Come on cocksucker make me cum now! He knew I was close when I my cock inflated. Good boy oh yeah. Without warning him I began to shoot my load down his throat. The second he realised he sucked harder so he could get it all out of me. It was like he was starving. It got to a point where he was hurting my now sensitive cock. I tried to push his head off it but the force was too strong. He just kept sucking and wasnt going to let go. I grabbed his hair and yanked his head back. His tongue still tried to get to my cock head. I let go when I thought he had finished but he immediately began deep throating me again. This time I took both his ears pulled his head back and stood up. Thats it! Thanks mate. I zipped up. Anytime he replied in his Eastern Block accent. I rushed off, fifteen minutes late for dinner.

Eating my tempura and sushimi, the sex experience didnt really enter my mind. It could have happened years ago or not at all. But later in bed while thinking about it I got hard. I know what he was going through. You want to make the other man totally satisfied. When Im in that position I always want the man, whose cock I am in awe of, to just take total advantage of my weakness.

My weakness...

no hassles no pressure

We had been exchanging emails ever since he replied to my ad for Just Hot Sex. I met him all the way out west at his Storage warehouse business. The weather was sticky. Your regular average sort of bloke; he wore shorts, t-shirt and a smile that reminded me of Kevin Costner. His manner suggested a Country boy at heart. He mentioned a few times, in passing, how fit he was. His hands spoke of physical workloads over the years. I mentioned I was going to have a small joint before we got into it. For a second he was curious about weed and asked if the effects of smoking it occurred straight away or took some time to come on. I told him it was instant and mischieviously asked if he wanted to try some. No no mate. Im right. Just make sure the butt is thrown that way he said pointing to a tight gap between two 40 ton shipping containers that sat near the entrance to the warehouse. We cant have people thinking Mr Perfect was smoking that stuff. Mr Perfect? Interesting...

After my smoke I walked into his office; stained blue carpet, a long orange enquiries counter with four desks sitting ergonomically vacant behind it. Well here it is, this is the place All I could think of was his cock. I had seen it protruding in his shorts earlier and was keen to see it unravel in front of me. He moved closer and got it out. You know what you want?. I began salivating and swallowed. I've been thinking about this all week I dropped down to my knees and took his big cock to the back of my mouth. Its taste was beautiful. I sucked hard and made an appreciative groaning sound. I knew I could let loose on this one and went for it. Deep throat it he demanded and he slid it all the way back. I moaned with absolute pleasure and continued to suck its full length. He let me enjoy myself for a while then fucked my face. He pulled his dick out suddenly, looking like he was about to cum thanks to my efforts, thrusted his balls in my face and commanded Lick em. I was all over his sweaty balls in a nano second. I rubbed my tongue, nose and face all over them. Come on, lick my arse now and make sure you stick your tongue right in there. I moved my head around and kissed his arsehole three times then went to work with my tongue. I moaned and moaned and was prepared to lick his arse for as long as he wanted me to. How can you describe the beauty of licking someones tasty arse while they stand tall with one foot up on a chair in a position of absolute power? This was pure bliss to me. His smell and taste overwhelmed my senses and I was clearly in a trance-like state, under his total command.

After more licking sucking and sniffing he bent me over You want this up your arse?. Fuck yeah!. A few seconds of discomfort initially followed (whispering Come on, come on) then he rammed it all the way up me. My face contorted and I straightened up. He held me in position and pumped hard. He made me sit on his cock then bent me over then made me get on top of him while he layed on the floor. I couldnt help but think about his office staff who inhabit this office space during business hours. Their "Mr Perfect" boss likes to fucks blokes in the arse right here next to your hard-drive and sometimes right on the very chair you sit on for up to eight hours a day. This is what Ive been wanking over all week I offered. Pull your cock while I fuck you and cum. Not long after; Hurry up. Are you gonna cum or what?! He seemed angry. I lost concentration for a second then wanked faster. I could have cum earlier but wanted to make it last. He seemed to have a deadline approaching. Come to think of it he kept looking at the security CCTV screen every now and then. I came on his stomach and he came, with a loud gutteral sound, not long after. Covered in sweat we began to dress. It was 5.45pm. He told me he had to set the alarm by 6pm otherwise Security get concerned and possibly suspect somethings wrong. It appears he really does have great time management skills.

As I put on my shoes, I told him if he wants to catch up again let me know. He said he gets turned on by skinny girly Asian guys who like to cross dress. Fuck, thats as about as opposite as you can get to me. He thought I had replied to his ad which was for Effeminate Asian cross dresser but I told him I replied to his reply to my Just Hot Sex ad. He looked confused. I said Fuck it, I'd still like it if you would fuck my face til you cum. Let me know. He started to say Oh Im very busy... but I interjected Thats cool, you got my email address if you get some free time. No hassles no pressure.

I got home and wrote him a brief email titled I Want More.

unsexy

After my last dismal sex club adventure my cock head was feeling itchy for two days. I thought I had caught something but its gone. Maybe just irritated Nothing to worry about. Maybe thats why I havent really had the urge to go out looking for anything. Thats not to say I havent sent emails to potential sex buddies. Theres the married guy who just wants someone to suck him off regularly, no strings attached. Cool. That could happen. Theres the bloke who told me I was "handsome"; that hasnt happened yet. The one who wants someone to take instructions and so on.

I'm one of those guys who makes all these arrangements on the net and then never bothers to follow through with a meeting. Well I have actually met up a few times. I guess I want something instantly. You know, when you feel the urge, you get it then and there. All this making times and dates takes too much planning. I guess that why sex clubs and beats are good because they can often give you instant gratification.

I wanked last night imagining group sex. I might be going to a group sex session next week. Ive had group sex a few times in the past. One was in a motel room with about 8 guys. It wasnt too bad except I thought it was going to last longer but most of the guys just blew and left. I did get fucked by a big cock but in the end it was just a big anti climax. Im not feeling like sex at the moment. In fact I feel totally unsexy.

The first time I had sex was as a young boy. I was about 7 years old. A cousin who was possibly a teenager at the time talked me and my 8 year old brother into sucking his cock. I think he tried to fuck my brother too but Im not sure if he did. He told my brother to suck my dick and I remember it felt good and then when I was supposed to suck his cock I only did it for a short time then said I didnt want to anymore. That was the end of sex until I was in my teens.

I was about 15 years old and wagging school in the city. Still in my school uniform I was picked up at a video game arcade by this blonde guy maybe mid 20s. He took me to his place, gave me a bottle of cocke, then led me to his bedroom. I froze and changed my mind about it all. He was ok about it and said he'd be at the same video arcade on the sunday. I turned up and this time I sucked his big cut cock and he fucked me. I remember as he slid his cock in slowly he kept asking me if I was ok. Once he was in he began fucking me slowly. His pace increased and he blew inside me. He made a load groan. I got dressed and went home. That was the first time I really sucked a cock and got fucked. I never felt the same after that. That guy wanted to see me again but a mixture of guilt and fear that he would somehow find me and tell my family that he fucked me hard and I loved it, prevented me from meeting up again. It would be a year or so later before I had sex again.

This time it was with what I thought was a German guy maybe 30s. He kept stroking my skin saying it was so smooth. We did a 69er and he asked me to please fuck him with my big cock. I did which I remember he loved. It funny you know, I was at a Christmas party last year and believe it or not that same guy was there, looking much older and with a tooth missing. I remembered him because of his distinctive facial features, where as I wouldnt remember the first guy even though that experience was far superior (something I have wanked over on a few occassions). It was definitely him and it turns out he's Czech. I spoke to him briefly just to see if he would recognize me. As I stared into his green eyes I could tell he wasnt sure. What would I have done if he did remember me anyway? Im not sure but judging by the way he looks these days I dont think I would have sex again with him, now Im in my 30s.

NYE - priority check

New Years Eve 2006 was one of those moments for me when I know I'm an idiot. What an absolute mistake it was to see the new year in at a sex club. Its not the going to the sex club part that makes me feel stupid but rather the fact that I could have spent it with my nephew who just turned twenty and wanted to see the new year in with me. Times like that dont come often and when you miss them its just too bad. These are the choices we make and Ive decided my choice on NYE was not thought out properly and was driven by my often insatiable desire for men. I mean, I didnt even feel like sex really but I went anyway.

The sex club was filled with a crowd that just didnt connect with me. Well except for the first guy who sucked me nicely to which I returned the favour and just when he was getting me close I said, I was going to give it a rest, he replied "Arent you gonna finish me off at least?" I got back on my knees and he let me have it. I swallowed. "You enjoyed that didnt you?" he said as he was zipping up his fly. "Yes mate I did" I replied quietly. "Well I might see you again Im just visiting from the country, Im here for 3 weeks".

What was it about the crowd last night? If I compare it to the awesome Christmas Eve crowd I'd have to say as a whole they just didnt turn me on. After walking around in circles for a whole night getting a suck here and being sucked there, getting fucked once, getting my arse licked etc, I ended up letting this small Asian dude, who was sucking cock like mad all night, blow me. When he latched onto my cock ,which was in a room, that smelled like faeces, I told him to suck it til I cum. He took a huge sniff of amyl and got to work on it. Some of these guys suck cock like they worship it or like its their job or something. I asked him if he wanted my cum and he replied "yes yes" so I shot my load in his mouth. He got up and scurried off in search of another drink of man's purest essence.

I left just after that. By that time I had been there for 6 hours! What a waste of time and energy. On my phone were several Happy New Year text messages and a few from my nephew "where are you?", "Are you coming". Ive deleted them but they are etched on my memory as another moment of bad judgement on my part. Sometimes I amaze myself at how Im wasting away my life. Moments like this confirm some of my deepest thoughts of being a worthless piece of shit. I chose to put cock as a priority. Im having a break from cock for a bit and just contemplate the coming year.

There was one song that I kept hearing everywhere all night - "No need to run/And hide/ Its a wonderful wonderful life". I've made a decision and 2006 will be a year of action (and i dont necessarily mean sex!).

Christmas Eve with meat

Christmas Eve was just one long hot hard cockfest. It was just after the 7.30 Report that I started feeling horny. Gone are the days when Christmas Eve was spent at home with the family watching the christmas tree lights blink on and off. All I could think about was whether there were any other horny toads out there like me.

I changed the CD. Why had I put on The Boatmans Call anyway? Queens of the Stone Age You Think I Ain't Worth A Dollar, But I Feel Like A Millionaire. Now thats more like it. I jumped into the shower. Dryed off. Rolled a joint. Hopped into jeans, t-shirt and tried to tame my fat hard-on before going out in public. Arriving at Central Station I checked my email and posted some messages for anybody who wanted some hot action to come on down to HQ sometime tonight.

Arriving at HQ I checked in my jacket, walked downstairs into the Suck Station and stuck my cock in the glory hole to get me in the mood. Immediately some bloke was working on it beautifully. I pulled it out as he was bringing me close to cumming and considering I had just arrived... well you know. I went back upstairs and smoked the joint. I came out and went back to the Suck Station. Another guy caressed my dick with his warm mouth. Again I pulled it out as I got close. He held onto it for as long as he could. In fact he was pulling my cock back in with his mouth. I really had to force it out. If this was a taste of things to come I was going to have a great night.

A short time later he arrived wearing a Penrith Tigers footy jersey and Quicksilver cap. Stocky and eyes that meant business. I cruised him but thought he wasnt interested. I decided to sit down in the upstairs video lounge and watched a black guy being fucked by two white guys - one in hisd arse and one in his mouth. They kept swapping positions. Earlier I had already had a thick 8inch throbber fed into my mouth (he also stopped before he came and said "you got a hot mouth"). I had sucked briefly on a couple of other guys - also stopping before they came. We were all just so horny. A skinny blonde guy crouched in front of me on all fours and stared up at me and to my crotch. I got it out and he worked on it for some time. At first he was going at it way too hard. This guy seemed like he had been starved of cock for a year and now that he had found some was going to feed himself as much as possible, enough to make up for the whole year. I guided his head and whispered "like this mate". He obeyed but just couldnt get it right. I got up again said thanks and went back searching for the footy bloke.

There he was in one of the dark rooms, waiting for someone to step into his trap. I stood outside for a bit then took a tentative step toward him. He stepped back a little into shadow, as if to invite me further. I took the bait, entered and he locked the door with great force as if to prevent any thoughts of escape I may have. I wasnt going to fuckin escape; this guy was hot and rock hard. Escape into him was the only place I wanted to go. He stared at me intensely as I rubbed his cock through his jeans. I took hi dick out and stared at its beauty. He pushed me down to get busy. I sucked it and moaned with pleasure. He took my head with both hands and began to fuck my face, moving in and out, side to side and occassionally every now and then thrusting it right down my throat. I couldnt stop. He couldnt stop.

He tore my head off his cock and for a sec I could saw it throbbing. He shoved my head into his balls "lick em" he ordered. "Thats right". He squeezed both his balls into my mouth and told me to look up. There he was looking down at me with a confident sense of power as I held both his big balls tightly in my mouth. He pushed my head off his balls and turned around. His firm arse was in my face. I opened the cheeks and sniffed inside. "Stick ya tongue in" I did and I felt his hand on the back of my head pushing it in further. He moved his arse up and down as if he was wiping it with my face. It tasted beautiful. I moaned uncontrolably. Turning around again he slapped his cock on my face then teasingly shoved it in and out of my open mouth. "Good boy" he said then "get up". He stuck one, two then three fingers up my arse while his other hand was held cupped in front of my face. I put my mouth into it like I was feeding out of his hands. He then moved my head to his armpit. I sniffed greedily. This is the smell of a real man. It got me higher. This is pure and so real. Im experiencing the real man. This man is at his most basic. A rawness often suppressed for the sake of the facade of normailty or respectability. But here its released and with great unadulterated strength and honesty. No judgements just instinct.

"Get ya jeans off". I took them off straight away. "Turn around". I did. "You want me to fuck you?" he asked as he whacked my arse hard once then twice. "Fuck yeah". Within seconds he had a condom on and was sliding his meat up my arse. I groaned in ecstasy. He made sure i took the whole length and just at that moment when I sighed "oh yeah" he began to pump me agressively with all his strength. This was the punishment I was looking for. He had me for whatever he wanted. After some time he took his cock out, ripped the condom off and said "you want my cum?". I opened my mouth willingly as he wanked the final strokes. I stuck my tongue out ready to receive his juice. He placed his cock head on my tongue and shot his load into my mouth. "Good boy" he kept saying repeatedly. Christmas trees were blinking their coloured lights all over the city.

I didnt leave straight away. There was another guy I had who enjoyed fucking my face and arse too. And of course there was the young one who ended up sucking me off and swallowing my cum. But the night belongs to the Footy bloke. He let me suck him briefly again a few hours later "you give great throat" he said. "Can I lick your arse again?" I asked. "Anytime mate" he said. I didnt get the chance as I left when I realised the time was heading toward the 3am mark. Guess what I was thinking all Christmas day with the family.

By the way I met up with that guy from Parramatta who said he took ages to cum and that not many people can make him cum from just sucking. Well I did it. As he was leading to up to shooting his big load down my throat he kept saying over and over "You're good, aaah you're good...".

Got an email yesterday from a bloke whose handle is "Rugged". He wants to meet up sometime soon for an outdoor session. His reply to the email I sent him with my picture was "Fuck yr handsome! Whenever your ready". Im going to give him the full treatment.

...Fleeting

I was having my cock sucked through a glory hole in a King Cross sex club by a young blonde guy while watching a girl get triple penetration by three hard German men. From the side a stocky bloke was watching me. At first, I looked away from his intense stare toward the TV screen where the three cut cocks were moving rapidly in and out, in and out of the girl who seemed to be having the greatest day of her life wearing nothing but some red patent leather 8 inch spikey stilettos and her body all twisted. We locked eyes. The cocksusker below was enjoying himself and snorting amyl. I open the door behind me and Stocky entered. While still being sucked softly by the blonde dude, I grabbed the stocky guys dick which was already out and hard. His balls were warm, loose and hairy. He squeezed my nipples and breathed on my neck. I retrieved my cock from the mouth of blondie (he made a sound of complaint), turned around and dropped to my knees and Stocky fed me his fat cock.
We went to a room, he pushed my nose into his armpit. I sniffed it cautiously at first. He whispered "stick your tongue in it". I hesitated. "Stick your tongue in it mate". I obeyed. It was so beautiful. His smell and taste. What was it? Not everybodys smell can do that to me. I would have sniffed and licked forever if he hadn't pushed me back onto my knees so I could take his cock again. I sniffed around his balls in bliss. He slapped his meat on my lips and cheeks first. He opened my mouth and fed me his meat. I tried to take the whole thing plus his balls. I was gone and I wanted it all.
Suddenly he lifted me up ripped my jeans off and before I knew it I was on my back and his cock was rammed into my arse. I moaned loudly. He slapped my chest and thighs repeatedly piercing me with his steely grey eyes, as if daring me to challenge his authority and power. He fucked me harder, I moaned "fuck yeah". He ripped the sock off my right foot and licked the sole of my foot, his hard cock staying deep inside me. He thrusted harder. Deep stabs.
He looked at his watch; he had done this twice earlier. I told him he could use my arse as long as he wanted. He knew that anyway. I was his all the way... well at least thats what I thought. He suddenly pulled out and looked around as if he had just woken up from a sexy dream. He ripped the condom off his dick, half smiled and pulled up his pants. "Can we do this again?" I asked. "No". "It was just starting up" I disappointingly complained with restraint.
He hurried out and didnt look back. I was left naked with one sock on, in shock. I lit a joint, wiped the sweat off my brow and shook my head in amazement. This was a bloke who knew exactly what to do with me. His smell, cock, style and aggression was exactly what I wanted, almost what I dreamed about in terms of hot sexual encounters. This guy was it and perhaps it freaked him out. Perhaps this was his fantasy, something he wanked over at night and when he found someone who had fantasized about and wanted to receive exactly the treatment he wanted to dish out, he fled. Perhaps...
Where was he going anyway?
I went back and let Blondie blow me. I whispered through the hole "suck me off. You can have my cum". He obliged then I went home. The next night I logged onto a sex website looking at pics of available guys (usually pics only of their cocks & chest or arse). One pic (headless of course) & profile reminded me of the stocky one I had that night. I emailed him to see if he indeed was the one. He replied the next day with "Nope no me".

one thing on my...

Yesterday after lying to some friends (I hadn't seen for ages) that I had "stuff to do" I went straight to a sex club and ended up staying in there for about 5.5 hours. Time seems to disappear when Im in those places. Its like I step out of reality and into some sort of sexually charged cabalistic fraternity where all that matters is cock. There were periods where I was just sat there watching aggressive hetero porn, smoking the odd cigarette (despite the no smoking or you'll be asked to leave signs everywhere) waiting for another cock or cocksucker to get busy with. I think I sucked about 4 guys through the glory holes. Two were nice thick cut cocks and they both came in my mouth. I got sucked by about 5 guys, only the last one getting my full load. He deserved it, he sucked me like he was in a trance and I love that. I just kept saying to him quietly "thats good mate". But thats the state, almost trance-like, that I go into when Im confronted by a beautiful cock and I know the bloke likes the way Im doing it. One guy I just hugged and wanked slowly for a little while - he told me that one of the guys (the one wearing the navy blue business suit and wedding ring) who sucked me was the father of a friend of his. He asked me if he gave good head. I said no but he sucked it like he wanted to devour it - bit too hard though. I withdrew my dick after a short while and he scurried off guiltily out the door.
The night before that I went to a local park to a toilet block, that stays open 24/7, only to find once again that nobody was there. Ive been there about 3 times and never find anyone there. Why bother? I guess its just the odd chance that some horny tradie or something will just happen to turn up. After that I went back home and logged into a few sites and got off on pics, messaged a few potential blokes in the hope I can get more action. I have to admit though Im one of those guys who often arrange meetings over the net and never turns up. In fact I did it yesterday.
In a few days Im possibly going to Parramatta to suck off this bloke with a big cock while he watches porn. He reckons he takes ages to cum and I told him "thats cool you just lay back, watch your porn and let me enjoy myself until you decide to shoot your load down my throat."
Im going to go to this one.